Transmuting Fear into Love!

Good Morning! It’s such a beautiful Friday morning! The sun is out , the birds are happily singing their little songs, and it’s sooooooo green! I send you loving light!  I haven’t blogged the last few days because I was dealing with a few issues.  At first it was hard to confront these issues because FEAR started to get in the way.  The fear I had forced me to travel back into the past. Back when I was very sick with severe mercury and heavy metal poisoning.  Fortunately the wonderful power of love came shining in, into my “NOW” and “Present” moment and the fear left just as quickly as it appeared.  You see my friends fear seems to work with past and future. Fear likes to work with memories or worry. Memories from our past, and worries about our future.  I learned that FEAR is simply an acronym for FALSE EVIDENCE APPEARING REAL, and my friends fear can rob us of our blessings.

With all of the X class Solar Flares that have been dancing off of the sun, many of us are going through a lot of health issues.  My biggie is my liver, that wonderful filtration system that our creator installed in each and every one of us.  When I was growing up I didn’t care to treat my body like the beautiful temple it is. I chose to drink, smoke cigarettes, eat foods like McDonald’s fast and convenient and ended up on a plethora of prescription drugs. I was depressed and felt all alone in this big world. I was separated because “the man upstairs” was casting his lighting bolts at me. I was a worthless sinner and worm in the dust.  The separation from the heavenly hosts grew more and more when I went to Keflavik Iceland for my tour in the Navy. Only than I felt like I was free to do whatever I pleased because even “God” couldn’t see me there.  I loaded my body with all kinds of toxins that did nothing to fuel me, but to poison me.  I lived my life in fear. Fear of disease, fear of lonliness, fear of everything!

Now back to what I was saying about the X class Solar Flares.  Our great sun this year has been sending to us many many solar flares. These flares are electro magnetic.  We are also electro magnetic beings. So when our great sun sends us these flares we are very much effected by them. Illnesses may crop up, irritation may crop up, because these solar flares are meant to pull that “shit” out of us.  The stuff that we experienced that we stuffed into our bodies to put aside or deal with another day.  A great example could be abuse either emotionally or physically.  At the moment it happened we just didn’t know how to deal with it so we tucked it away. Or we thought we did because it keeps popping up.  Many of the people I have met that suffered abuse from the hand of another are the most loving caring people. Because from the abuse they suffered they would never want another person to feel that way.  My heart goes out to all of the hearts that have gone through any type of abuse. That goes for animals as well.

This is the time to release all of the pent up significant emotional events that we have lived through. This is the time for true forgiveness.  FEAR is the only thing that will try to stand in our way of this release. I have learned that we can experience either Fear or Love.  The two can not live together nor ever will.  We as human beings have FREE WILL and we can choose what we want to experience and manifest that whatever it may be.  I have learned that as we grow older and experience life our breathing becomes shorter and faster almost to a point of anxiety.  Babies when they are born breathe into their bodies and their tummy’s raise in a nice flowing motion. That is until the point of a need not met fast enough, than it becomes quicker and follows with screaming. We just need to slow down again and fill ourselves with love. Visualizing something or someone we truly love can help with this. Doing this exercise everytime we start to feel the anxiety coming on will move that fear out and allow room for love to come pouring in!  Just by simply breathing deeply and visualizing. Taking the Power Back!

It took a couple days for me to bounce back and transmute that energy from fear into  love.  I did it by going outside and sitting in the sunlight. Closing my eyes and just breathing in love expanding the loving light that I am , and breathing out joy, Breathing in peace, and sending out loving light.  It doesn’t take long 15 minutes is plenty long enough. Also in being in the sun for 15 minutes a day I am getting enough Vitamin D to sustain me. 

Well my friends, brostars and sistars that’s about all I have to say today. The sun is out and it’s time for my Vitamin D intake.  I love you all so very much!

I ask for Love, Joy, Peace, Health, and Abundance, and what I ask for I ask for every MAN, WOMAN, and Child. Every HUE-MAN! And so it is.

Namaste’

Water is LIfe!

Good afternoon! Sending loving light to you and every MAN, WOMAN and CHILD in the Universe. I love you so very much! I especially send loving light to everyone experiencing pain.  Pain is a signal that our body gives us when there is something that isn’t quite right going on with our bodies.  Most of the time all we want is for the pain to go away and have relief.  So most of us will pop a pill of some sort that will mask the pain. I use to do that quite a bit when the pain would hit. It was so easy to pop some codeine, or prescribed migraine medicine, or Tylenol. Yes it would mask the pain but as soon as it wore off the pain would return again.  We have neurological pain, muscle pain, organ pain, all kinds of pain, even pain from a broken heart. I am here to tell you that if we listen to the pain it will generally tell us what it needs to go away. We just need to talk to ourselves and find out what our body needs."Have I eaten? What did I eat? Was it something to fuel my body with? Did I drink enough Water? Am I excercising enough? Have I gotten my 15 minutes of sunlight today?" 

I have found that when pain crops up in my body now, I speak to it. Most of the time my body will tell me what is going on.  “Hey Deb, you are experiencing this headache at this time because you have not been drinking enough water.”  I hear this message quite a bit because I am one that really doesn’t drink enough clean filtered water.  You see I mentioned clean filtered water because I have learned that the fluoride they put into our water is a toxic poison. Many countries have banned fluoride because outside of the united states of America they call it rat poison. There are many people lobbying our government today to have fluoride removed from our water, and to date there are a few cities and states that have banned it.  Fluoride is also a filler that is used in every single over the counter and prescription drug in the market today.  There is no evidence that fluoride is healthy or does anything for our teeth. Think about it why does the toothpaste have directions to call the poison center if swallowed? And we use it on our teeth?

I know that I fit into the group that doesn’t drink enough pure filtered water.  I have no excuse. I just don’t drink enough of it and when I don’t I can suffer from aches and pains from my head, kidneys, all the way down to my toes to the top of my head. Water is what helps moves all that ‘stuff’ through us and pushes it out through our bodies.  Most of us are dehydrated and no drinking tea or coffee or soda isn’t a sufficient way to hydrate us.  We would find that if we upped our water intake we wouldn’t have a need for chap stick. One of the first signs of dehydration is being thirsty in itself.  Adding a slice of lemon or even slices of cucumber can greatly enhance the taste of water and also boost the nutrients we receive. Water is life. 

Dr. Masuro Emoto discovered the amazing power that water has, by writing on the water bottle different words and intentions. One of these words was “LOVE”. He than froze the water and sliced it into sections which he placed under a microscope.  The crystals the water had were beautiful. He also wrote “Hate” those water crystals were ugly and mishapen.  I have included the Youtube video in todays blog.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAvzsjcBtx8

Our bodies are made up of a very high percentage of water and when our intentions are not very good just think about what that water in our bodies is doing.  When we are good to ourselves and are filled with love again just think what that water in our bodies is doing.   Something definitely to think about!

Like I said before water is life!

When we understand that our bodies are truly temples and if we take care of our temples our bodies will take care of us, we can TAKE THE POWER BACK.  So my friends I raise my water bottle to you in celebration to a healthier body, mind, and spirit!

I love you all so very much! I ask  for LOVE, JOY, PEACE, HEALTH and ABUNDANCE, and what I ask for myself, I ask for every MAN, WOMAN, and CHILD. And so it is.

I love you so very much.   Namaste’ 

Shift Happens!

Shift Happens

Good morning to you! Happy mother’s day to every mother! Choosing to be a mother and taking on the most important job of all is quite a task. Congratulations to all who embarked on that pathway. The children are so precious and chose us to be their moms, this isn’t a job to be taken lightly.  We are here to love them and  guide them in their chosen pathways which could be very different from our own.

Today I want to talk about the shift that every man, woman and child is experiencing. When you become aware that you truly are shifting that is when you hold the power in your own hands.  Take a moment to objectively look back in your life. By objectively I mean look back on it as if you are watching a movie, unattached, unemotional. There is no need to go through the emotions of where you were, because that was then, and it is in the past. If something does come up that stirs you, it could be an opportune time to LET IT GO.  Look back to 10 years ago, and now 5 years ago even 1 year ago.  Do you see the changes?

The changes I have seen in my life have been HUGE! My friends I use to live in a place of fear.  It was a very dark place full of sickness, uncertainties, depression, anger, and yes once even greed. My body was very unhealthy because I didn’t care about it.  Stopping at McDonalds for an “all American meal”. For those of you who don’t know what it is , your choice of hamburger or cheeseburger, small fries, and a small coca cola.  I justified my eating by using the “food pyramid” and saying catsup and pickles were veggies along with French fries, covered the meat level , and the bread level ,  and cheese hit the dairy group. It was kind of like Bill Cosby justifying chocolate cake was a good breakfast food or the government saying pizza qualifies as a vegetable.  I was taking prescription drugs.   I worked most of the time 70-80 hours a week for the Nielsen Company. Didn’t really know who my daughter was because it was most of time in passing when I saw her.  When I wasn’t working I was trying really hard to find love.  My ego was so inflated. I had to flat out tell lies to people and or omission of the truth, which is a lie almost everyday to do my job.  I drank alcohol to escape from my life  and others. I felt worthless and was ready to be taken off the planet.  I was sick and wanted to die and be done with it. I had huge lesions in my brain and couldn’t have one complete thought. I believed I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, all the time. I had no kitchen energy thus all of the fast and convenient food…  and I could go on and on. of Well brostars (brothers) and sistars (sisters), that was then. Hmmm I would say 5 maybe 6 to even 10 years ago now.

1 year ago… I was excited because I was going to be a grammy and I watched my daughter grow from a teenager, into a beautiful woman, to a mommy.  My daughter and I have an awesome relationship. I eat HEALTHY by the rainbow, and not the lie of the “food pyramid”. I use food and herbs as my medicine and I am actually healing my body now. I know and speak the truth.  I understand who truly owns The Nielsen Company, and know that our televisions are an instrument of brainwashing. I would much rather spend my time talking, laughing with my family and meditating, or researching something new. I love me. I am in a beautiful loving relationship. Every relationship that i have is love. I am an amazing cook when I put my own creativity into it. I don’t want to escape from my life because I love it so much I want to be present in every moment of it. I am priceless to my LOVING CREATOR Mother Father God  and I have a mission to help humanity see the power they truly have to raise the vibration of this beautiful planet Gaia we live on by simply living from their hearts.  I am happy and I love my life! I am in love with everyone and everything! And the list goes on and on.

Yes I went through and am going through  a shift and you are too.  Thus the reason why people are tired of taking prescriptions because they aren’t helping and shifting to eating healthier. Thus the reason why relationships may be actually starting to heal.  My friend it’s because you too are shifting from living in your ego inside your brain (selfishness),  to living in your soul inside your heart(selflessness).  We are living in the Age of Aquarius now.  On Dec 21, 2012 an apocalypse happened, no not doom and gloom, or the end of the world, but the end of the time of living in the ego, and the beginning of  time of living in the soul, the heart.  The ego cares less if you eat healthy because the ego is in it for the pleasure of the eating, not to fuel your beautiful body. The soul, heart, cares about your health and loves the taste of fresh  organic vegetables to fuel your beautiful body.  Are you starting to see you now in your shift?

In shifting and raising your vibration you are letting your light shine brightly before the world, and than you become the light tower guiding others to raise their vibration to love.  Hmmm a great master told us about being lights in the world. The salt of the earth. Remember my friends salt heals. That’s why we take Epsom salt baths.  For me I chose that it was time for me to step up and reclaim my power. I AM, WE ARE, I AM WE. WE AM. YOU AM TOO. I AM YOU. YOU ARE ME. WE AM. And I reclaim the power that I thought I lost! 

Well that’s about all I have to share with you this wonderful SUNDAY MOTHER’S DAY morning. Some time soon I will tell you about the incredible experiences I had this weekend, but that’s a whole nother blog for another time.  Oh one more thing, we all shift at different speeds according to our own free will. You may be shifting at a much slower or even faster rate. The point is if you open your eyes you will see it. Smilez it’s your choice. I love you so very much! We are raising the vibration together so that we can all ascend together changing one heart at a time! LOVE IS THE ONLY WAY WE CAN DO THAT. Loving yourself first unconditionally and than everyone else unconditionally  like you love yourself.  Sending love to ALL SOULS in the UNIVERSE. Love to the PEOPLE EVERYWHERE!!! Namaste’

These pictures are of my wise grand daughter Aspen Sage. I ask for LOVE , JOY, PEACE, HEALTH AND ABUNDANCE, and what I ask for myself. I ask for EVERY MAN, WOMAN and CHILD. 

Manifestation Complete!

Good Morning to you on this sunny beautiful Friday Morning! Sending loving light to you! I love you so very much.  Today I just wanted to share with you the wonderful power that you have to manifest!

A Saw a post yesterday by Abraham Hicks that touched me greatly.

“Chronic Pain can never go away. It is impossible, because it has been labeled Chronic Pain which means it’s always present and It stays forever.

She has got to start calling it intermittent pain and than she has got to start calling it occasional pain, and than she has got to start calling it insignificant pain and than it will be gone.

But as long as she calls it chronic pain it will stay forever.” ~Abraham Hicks

I read this and I am here to tell you this is true!

Let me tell you about our day yesterday.  My daughter has been looking for donated breast milk for a few days now because do to an illness she experienced her milk ran out. It hasn’t been easy because she is looking for the “holy grail” of breast milk, dairy free, drug free, and vegetarian. Chances of finding this are pretty slim.  Well she kept the faith and kept manifesting and sure enough she was contacted by a wonderful lady in Colorado Springs. Manifestation Complete!  So yesterday at 12:30 we packed up the car diaper bag, extra formula and filtered water for us and headed down to Colorado Springs.   We were travelling pretty smoothly until traffic came to a dead stop at the Larksburg exit. In all actuality we only had another 15 minutes to travel to our destination.   It was raining horribly and there were small hail pieces along the road. We waited and waited for traffic to move, but no dice.

 I heard a voice say “Hey Deb, this is a perfect time to meditate! Why not send loving light to all the people in the traffic? While you are at it Send loving light to everyone in the WORLD!”

Hmmm… Sounds like a great idea.  Aspen was asleep and Sky was jamming to some great spiritual music by Kanandruma. I closed my eyes and for 2 hours I sent the warmest, pink, fuzzy beautiful energy to everyone that popped into my head.  It was beautiful. I could feel people’s spirits lift from the space they were in.  I’m sure some of you felt it.  I came out of deep meditation and very soon traffic was moving again.  As it turned out there was an accident in the North Bound lane and traffic actually ceased moving because of the heavy rain and hail but to look at what happened! The southbound lane was clear and we reached our destination not at 1:30 in the afternoon but at 3 pm. Skye and my stomaches were growling big time, and we started talking about food. Now there are plenty of food stops, Taco Bell, Mcdonald’s, Carl Jr.s., but My family has chosen to eat healthy, and well there just aren’t any fast healthy food stops as of yet.

Skye and I both were in need of a bathroom and were very hungry when we arrived at the donor’s home.  Of course she let us in and happily let us use the bathroom.  She had 100 ounces of dairy free, drug free, vegetarian milk for us that she just gave us! Manifestation Complete! We asked her if there was a nearby Tokyo Joe’s where we could get a bite to eat.  She had never heard of such. She asked us what else we liked to eat. We explained to her that we were meat free, sugar free, gluten free, cow dairy free.  She smiled at us and our hopes raised immediately.  “Well she said there is a vitamin cottage in Monument just up the road a bit.”

OMG! Really a Vitamin Cottage in Monument?  Manifestation Complete! We jumped back in the car with Baby Aspen fast asleep and headed to Vitamin Cottage following her directions! On the way Skye and I talked about wouldn’t it be great to have a HUMMUS WRAP! Ohh a hummus wrap would be just perfect!  A crunchy veggie hummus wrap for Skye and a roasted red pepper hummus wrap for me!  We imagined and dreamed about it during the 15 minute drive.  We spotted Vitamin Cottage pulled into the parking lot and walked through the doors.  Guess what?  In the cooler were 4 hummus wraps!  One crunch veggie, 2 roasted red pepper and a greek one!  Manifestation Complete!  Not only that OMG they were marked down!!!  We grabbed the two sandwiches we manifested, and found 2 bags of boulder chips.  I had been looking for gluten free soft flour tortillas in Denver for the last 2 months and when  I turned around ,guess what I found? Yep gluten free soft flour tortillas! WOW this was great!  Our vibration raised up even more.  We left Vitamin Cottage with huge smiles and continued our journey home!

I know some would say that these were only little things that happened. Yes that’s true but our thoughts manifested these little things!  Which goes back to the message I posted by Abraham Hicks.  I encourage you my friend to “take back your power!” Realize today that your thoughts do manifest and that you have the power to control them!  I could go on all day and tell you countless of other stories  of even really bigger manifestations that have happened to us and those that are close to us. Maybe someday I will, but for today I will just leave you with that.  Become aware of your thoughts and words and make them count for you!

I love you all so very much! Sending you loving light!

I ask for Love, Joy, Peace, Health and Abundance, and what I ask for myself I also ask for every MAN, WOMAN, and CHILD!  And so it is.

Namaste’

Unconditional Love and Forgiveness

Good Morning to you! Sending loving light to you on this wonderful day! Today the new moon is with us, and the new loving energies are pouring in.  What a wonderful day to talk about forgiveness and unconditional love. After all there can be no unconditional love without forgiveness.  Forgiveness is a wonderful tool that we have a choice to use.  When we forgive we experience true release and have true freedom and when we have that we can clear our bodies of all illness and can have total peace.

“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. “ Or “ Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.” We have all heard the Lord’s Prayer many times during our existence. In high school our choir director Mr. Andres would have us sing it every spring concert. All of the alumni would run up the aisles to sing it with us. I can still hear it echoing in my memories.

What does it mean? Well exactly what it says.  We are forgiven therefore we should freely forgive. Holding a grudge just isn’t worth the energy nor the dis-ease that can follow. We all experience not so pleasant things during our lifetime but when we look at these things as lessons. We find it all is truly worth it.  Have you ever stopped to think that maybe that person was intentionally placed in your pathway specifically for your growth? I have had several experiences with people that have rubbed me the wrong way, but looking back, I always find that it was a necessary experience to make me the person who I am today.

One very good example I can give you was my marriage. We have all been there thinking we were all alone in this world. Wanting to have a husband or a wife. Wanting to feel loved.  Even thinking that if we didn’t marry by a certain age we would be all alone, and even “die an old maid.”  So we find somebody we are attracted to fall in “love” and get married.  The man I married had a gentle heart, was kind, considerate, would give the shirt off of his back to anyone in need. As a matter of fact he took his summer leave from the military to come to Colorado and build my brother quite an elaborate wheel chair ramp for his home.  We loved each other and started a family. Soon though that love grew cold and we ended up in divorce.  I look back and analyzed our situation and I found out the answer why our love grew cold.  I can honestly say I did not love him unconditionally. You see I found out in order for a relationship to work unconditional love was the key.  Instead of letting my heart lead the way I allowed my ego to rule my life.  Our marriage soon became a competition which led to a lot of anger and even worse abuse. I had the “what about me” attitude, and I honestly didn’t know how to be married. Sure I loved him, but it was the ego kind which isn’t really love at all it was based on fear. The fear of being alone. We ended up hurting each other very deeply. Me with my cutting words and him with his brute strength.  Instead of forgiving one another we fought constantly. The ego love is the” it better be a huge diamond, and don’t ever forget our anniversary”, it’s the Zales diamond commercial we see on TV. It’s the Barbie dream house and Ken relationship. It’s not coming together as one, but keep fighting for your independence always asking what’s in it for me. My ego and his ego clashed so much that unconditional love never had a chance. It all ended in a messy divorce.  I literally hated him for quite a while and held onto that grudge for years. It was him who literally brought me out of the closet to my parents and I hated him for it. Which now I understand that he loved me enough to play that “bad” guy in my life. I needed that push out of the closet to get on with my own life.

Only a few years ago was I able to come to terms with those many years of my life.  For 5 years of that 13 year marriage I was sick and wheelchair bound. For 5 years I was so drugged up most of the time on pain killers, anti depressants, stomach pills, anti-anxiety pills, soooo many pills, and a breathing machine at night for severe sleep apnea to boot.  I didn’t know nor care who I truly was. He tried his best to care for me. My heart was hardened and I couldn’t know love. It takes two to make a marriage but I didn’t actively participate really from day one. I got married because it was the thing to do, being a fundamental Baptist, I certainly couldn’t have relations with a girl. Everyone has the dream of the house with the white picket fence, the dog in the yard and the 2 kids. That is what we are programmed to do anyway.  So confused torn and ego leading the way I said “I do.”  Our marriage was pretty rocky from the start. Of course I figured if we just had a baby all of our problems will go away. He had a vasectomy during his previous marriage so he underwent the surgery to reconnect so we could have a baby.  Unfortunately the surgery left him with “lazy swimmers” so we persued other means. Needless to say it worked and we had a beautiful baby daughter.  Of course our problems didn’t go away they only got worse.  Soon our marriage was nothing but anger and competition, getting one up on each other. Don’t get me wrong we did have our happy times together, but the fear and anger kept it’s shadow because I allowed it to.

After some serious work  on myself through the years. I was finally able to let go and forgive not only him but myself. It wasn’t easy as my ego kept trying to justify my actions and words. But the time finally comes when we examine ourselves and see where all of our energy is going and what is truly worth it.  Instead of blaming him for everything I had to be honest with myself and that was I didn’t love him unconditionally.  I wrote a letter to him a couple of years ago after I had found out he had a heart attack. I asked him for forgiveness and told him that I forgive him and I truly do love him and I wished him well.  Although he hasn’t responded I was able to let everything go and love him unconditionally now. I have moved on with my life and so did he and my healing began.  You see we can get so wrapped up in ourselves that dis-ease can set in or an illness we have been carrying can become worse the more we hold that grudge inside.

I experienced such a release I cried for weeks.  I finally put my body at-ease and in so doing I opened it up to heal.  To be healthy I figured out not only my body, but my mind and spirit needed to be healed as well.

My friend you too can be healed too  of whatever may be ailing you.  None of the drugs in the world can do for you what forgiveness and unconditional love can do. Whatever it is let it go and embrace love. Forgive yourself, forgive others and start unconditionally loving today. I love you so very much!

I ask for Love, Joy, Peace, Health and Abundance, and what I ask for I ask for every MAN, WOMAN and CHILD. And so it is.

Namaste’

Always Do Your Best

Good morning to you on this rainy day in Littleton, Colorado. Sending loving light to you!   I love the smell of rain it cleanses and refreshes everything around us.  Everything turns green and we know that spring has truly arrived.  Today I want to talk a bit about Agreement Four from Don Miquel Ruiz’s book THE FOUR AGREEMENTS.  “Always Do Your Best”.

Wow what a concept to follow.  If you are like me, in the past when I did something, I didn’t always put my heart and soul and every fiber of my being into it, and I would end up doing a half-assed job.  The term “close enough for government work”, comes to mind.  After I finished reading THE FOUR AGREEMENTS and putting them into a daily practice my life changed immediately. I realized that when I do my best no matter what anyone said I was at peace with whatever I set out to do.

My creativity jumped into high gear especially with cooking and preparing healthy food for my family. I learned that my best was always doing something with absolute love in my heart.  I use to cook out of a box for convenience. It was so easy just to add a few ingredients to whatever the already processed box had in it and serve it up. Even worse open prepackaged food throw into the microwave and zap we are ready to eat.  The drive-thru was also so convenient means of providing for my family. Even going out to eat seemed to always be a better option.  As a matter of fact our living room wall use to be decorated with menu’s of all our favorite places. That was until I got sick once again.

 You see my friends I have been running the hamster wheel through this health cycle for a very long time.  The first pictures that I posted of me fat and sick were from the year 2000. I had an accident  in 1999 that my nervous system didn’t recover from.  My flight or fight system kicked on full time and I was in soooo much pain 24/7. The doctors called it many different things from RSD (reflex sympathetic dystrophy to Complex Regional Pain Syndrome.  If I were more aware of my body back than and it’s needs for proper fueling I could have used alternative methods for healing instead of relying on pharmaceuticals to get me through the day.  Instead I put my faith into Western Medicine and well, one pill led to another which led to another which led to another… I’m sure you all get the gist.  Before I moved back to Colorado I basically stayed in a hotel room detoxing from all of the prescription drugs. I didn’t have a lot of money as I was all alone, I had just left my husband  who was in the military and my divorce was final. I no longer was able to get prescription drugs because without military insurance it was an out of pocket cost of about $3000 a month so I went through a crash withdrawal.  I had  been living  in a cheap hotel room for 3 months in Virginia. I had my cat Cletus and a few credit cards with a few dollars open on them.  I was eating cheese and tortillas and ramen noodles for every meal heated in a microwave. That was when I felt like eating because the withdrawals were so bad some days I didn’t leave my bed. I had sunk about as low as I could go, and suicidal thoughts haunted me daily.  The judge basically gave my ex-husband everything and at that time I didn’t care because I still wanted the best for my daughter. I started losing weight in a very unhealthy matter because I didn’t have the proper nutrients to fuel my body with. I called the suicide hotline a few times when the detoxing got to be too much. I just wanted to die. They told me to call the local hospital. I had truly hit rock bottom.  In tears I called my mom and asked if I could please come home and start over.  You see I had been somewhat disowned because my secret of being a lesbian came out. When we buried my brother who died with ALS Lou Gherigs disease,  and my dad found out I was a lesbian, he buried two children instead of one.  So there I was malnourished, sick and literally dying in a strange hotel all alone with just my cat. I had to decide if I wanted to truly live or not.  That’s when I called my mom and my parents lovingly said “Yes, I could come back home.”  

When I moved back  to Colorado in 2004 I started acupuncture and was put on the Candida diet. I had a change of heart and wanted to live.  I looked for answers.  Being off the prescription drugs enabled me to function again.  My sister gave me an acupuncture certificate for Christmas and that opened the door for me to alternative medicine.  I started eating good nutritious foods that fueled my body and started to get my health back.  It didn’t take long after cutting sugar, caffeine, and yeast and any foods that grew yeast out of my diet to bounce back. 

That lasted for a while until I started eating fast foods again once again out of convenience.  Once again jumping on the hamster wheel of sickness.  Which I ‘ll talk about at another time.

I told you all of that to tell you this.  From the choices I made I obviously wasn’t doing the best I could for my body. I started doing all the research I could to find health so that I could live a quality life. Today I sit here telling you my story my life has turned around. I am in a very happy healthy relationship, I have a happy healthy family and instead of going around saying “I hate my life.”  I now go around enthusiastically claiming how wonderful my life is.

I prepare healthy quality food for my family and we are in bliss. I smile laugh and sing in the kitchen slicing veggies, and preparing foods that taste and look fabulous.  I meditate daily and send loving light to all those in need. Which in my book is EVERY MAN, WOMAN, and CHILD. I now strive to do MY BEST at whatever I take on.  I do this because I know deep in my heart that whenever that moment comes along when my ego tries to slam me back under it’s control, I can smile and quiet the voice by saying… “I DID MY BEST”.

I know that by following and practicing THE FOUR AGREEMENTS

1.       Your Word is Impeccable

2.       Never Take Anything Personally

3.       Never Assume Anything

4.       Always Do Your Best

I WILL ALWAYS HAVE LOVE, JOY, PEACE, HEALTH and ABUNDANCE every day of my life.

I ask for Love, Joy, Peace, Health, and Abundance, and what I ask for myself, I ask for EVERY MAN, WOMAN and CHILD. And so it is.  Namaste’ I love you.

Never Assume Anything

Good morning to you! Sending out loving light to each and every one of you this morning! Today is such a wonderful Tuesday and a great day for manifesting! One very important thing I learned while taking the power of getting my health back was Agreement Three from THE FOUR AGREEMENTS. NEVER ASSUME ANYTHING. We all have heard that old cliché’ “When you assume, you make an ass out of me you and me.” Well I am here today to tell you this is true! I grew up thinking that if I assume the worse possible thing than I could be pleasantly surprised when something good happens. Boy was I ever wrong. No wonder why the worse things kept happening to me.

In my health for instance, I assumed that the doctors in the white coats were the miracle workers and they had all of the answers. I simply took for granted without proof that taking all of those prescription pills would make me better. The term “off label use”, became very familiar to me and I assumed that my doctors did the research and when they told me some of the side effects they were minor. You know, such as minor nausea, and possible sleep disturbances, possible weight gain all minor effects. When I picked up my prescriptions at Eckerd’s or the base pharmacy I was given a small piece of paper with tiny writing that listed a few more side effects. I didn’t know at the time however that by taking that one little prescription pill of Neurontin and Vicodin would lead to a plethora of more prescriptions to help with all of the side effects that those two little pills caused. Soon I was taking handfuls of pills three times a day. Sometimes I didn’t even know who I was, or where I was. As a matter of fact I missed many years of my daughter’s life because I was physically there but not mentally or spiritually. People used to say things about me like “The lights are on but nobody is home!” I felt like I was just a blob of human flesh. One of the prescriptions they put me on for off label use for nerve pain was actually an anti -depressant which I later learned was an Anti-psychotic medicine which actually had a side effect I learned later on of suicidal behavior. No wonder I tried to commit suicide twice!

A few years ago I decided to do a study of all the medicines I was on. So I went to the FDA website and started looking up drug labels. I printed out all of the drug labels I could find which was a good thing, because now on the website most all of the labels can no longer be researched. One thing I learned was that when a doctor says “off label” or there is a new drug out I learned that it means,
“ The pharmaceutical company is using you as a gunea pig to see what the effects of this drug are.” I learned that when a doctor prescribes a pill to us for an illness they look up the illness in a book published by… the pharmaceutical companies to see what little pill best fits the needs of the patient. Than we take that little piece of a paper verified by a doctors signature to our local pharmacy, who carries that little pill. Where did the pill come from? It was manufactured by the same pharmaceutical company that published the book the doctor looked up. That’s where the insurance company comes in. They the ones that actually approve of what treatment or pill the doctor prescribed to us. They are the ones that we pay high premiums to so they can pay the doctor and the pharmaceutical company for the little pills. Wow do you have a headache yet? What a cycle to go through for us who want good health. Of course like I said before that one little pill will cause a numerous amount of side effects so it’s back to the doctor again to get yet another pill….. One more thing in my research I also found out that each little pill, either pharmacy or over the counter is filled with fillers. Did you know that every pill contains fluoride as a filler? Fluoride that has been linked to such disease as say for instance Alzheimers and tons of other disease? Which is a whole other rabbit hole I will discuss at another time.

In my journey to health I have discovered that there is another way. Instead of putting my faith in and assuming that the doctors who were trained by pharmaceutical companies and even receive perks from the pharmaceutical companies for prescribing their little pills such as golf vacation packages, elaborate meals, and even new cars. With all of the lawsuits against the pharmaceutical companies I have put my trust in the natural cures of mother earth such as eating fresh organic foods, drinking filtered water, acupuncture, massage, herbs and oils and meditation our bodies have the natural ability to heal ourselves. I know this works. I have even wowed the doctors by my improvement. For instance I had an MRI that showed tons of tiny lesions all over my spinal cord along with huge lesions in my brain. After dropping all pharmaceuticals I started using marijuana. Guess what the tiny lesions on my spinal cord seem to just disappear. I am still working on healing the brain lesions but I am feeling better and better with each passing day.

To wrap this all up in a nutshell. I have learned to never assume anything anymore from anyone. I trust myself in my decisions and my life has been so much happier and healthier. Assuming something to be fact without proof can lead us into all kinds of misery my friends. I encourage you to do the research. I love you all so very much! I wish for Love, Joy, Peace, Health, and Abundance, and what I ask for myself I ask for EVERY MAN, WOMAN, and CHILD. Sending you loving light! Namaste’